Ideas, resources and recommendations on creating the best conditions for living a good life, from lifehacks and new habits to tipps for a healthy lifestyle. Follow along on Refind to get the most relevant new links picked for you.
10 min read · 2020-12-23 · The other day I made an advice thread based on Jacobian’s from last year! If you know a source for one of these, shout and I’ll edit it in. Possessions 1 .If you want to find out about people’s…
Are you on the fence about breaking up or leaving your job? You should probably go ahead and do it. People, on average, end up happier when they take the plung
Discipline is superior to motivation. The former can be trained, the latter is fleeting. You won’t be able to accomplish great things if you’re only relying on motivation.
The 20-20-20 rule: Every 20 minutes of screenwork, look at a spot 20 feet away for 20 seconds. This will reduce eye strain and is easy to remember (or program reminders for).
3 min read · 2020-02-07 · My day was completely ruined yesterday when I stumbled upon a fun fact that absolutely obliterated my mind. I saw this tweet yesterday that said that not everyone has an internal monologue in their…
Sep 7th · Have you found yourself staying up late, joylessly bingeing TV shows and doomscrolling through the news, or simply navigating your day uninspired and aimless? Chances are you're languishing, says…
5 min read · Sep 15th · By using ‘distanced self-talk’, you can leverage the structure of language to take a step back and see the bigger picture
Through adopting this more distanced self-perspective, Aurelius was able to recognise that his feelings of anguish were temporary
The benefits were even greater when the children were told to adopt the perspective of a character with a reputation for hard work: eg, Batman or Dora the Explorer
This process of reflecting on one’s self using parts of speech that are typically used to refer to other people – ie, second- or third-person pronouns, or even one’s own name – is distanced self-talk. A mounting body of research by psychologists suggests that engaging in distanced self-talk can help us to regulate our negative thoughts and emotions in a range of situations – from working through a painful past experience to performing on a stressful upcoming task.
5 min read · Aug 21st · One of the reasons why we may end up acting more destructively and cruelly than we should is that it can take us a long time to fathom how someone like us could cause trouble for anyone. By ‘someone…
We are weak before the world and it is always more likely that someone else will be the aggressor.
The loving know how much everyone suffers from feelings of self-doubt, worthlessness, loneliness and pain beneath a veneer of imperviousness and strength.
To be a loving person is to wrestle with an always profoundly improbable idea: that however modest our position in society might be, however much we may have been maltreated in the past, however mesmerised we are by the deplorable behaviour of powerful individuals, however shy and frail we are, we are constantly capable of causing other people significant hurt.
3 min read · Aug 27th · There is a kind of person who seems at first glance to have an admirable degree of self-motivation, thoroughness and drive. They are up at dawn, they rarely take holidays, they are always sneaking in…
We need to shift our sense of where our drive is coming from.
Perfectionism, tragically, does not spring primarily from a love of perfection in and of itself. It has its origins in far more regrettable feeling of never being good enough. It is rooted in self-hatred, sparked by memories of being disapproved of or neglected by those who should have esteemed us warmly in childhood.
There will never be a point of rest or a lasting feeling of completion. In truth, we are ill rather than driven.
4 min read · Aug 27th · One of the ways in which we can accelerate, and keep faith with, change is to look forward to a time when it has occurred and anticipate what it might be like to have made progress with our psyches.…
Inner critic: You have wasted so much time. Self-loving reply: To which the only answer is love: love what remains of our days, love charity, self-forgiveness, mercy, modesty, acceptance, appreciation and gratitude.